A terrifying phenomenon occurred this Halloween Eve, as numerous elite black belts are reporting being “haunted” by the angry spirits of jiu-jitsu practitioners who suddenly and mysteriously disappeared shortly after receiving their blue belts.
Many of these “boo belts,” as they’ve been colloquially named, haven’t been seen in months or even years, and they had largely faded out of the memories of their former coaches and teammates. But this year, they have made their return to the world of the living in terrifying fashion.
One 20-year black belt who had won multiple World Championships described the bone-chilling moment that one blue belt, long thought to have been lost to the fatal “Blue Belt Blues” disease, stepped foot in his academy. “He looked familiar, but there was something… different about him,” said ‘Hoburto’ (name changed for anonymity). “His eyes were swollen and red, and his physical form was different. He was like an angry, vascular cube, as wide as he was tall.” Here, ‘Hoburto’ lowers his voice. “He said he crawled out from the deepest layer of hell and wouldn’t rest until he’d defeated me by ref decision.”
(A separate source from the same gym reported that the blue belt had said “wrestling class” rather than “hell”; the Jiu-Jitsu Times was unable to confirm or deny either grappler’s recollection of the quote.)
Miles away, a former ADCC champion, also speaking under the guise of anonymity, reported a similar situation that he said left him chilled to his core. This time, though, the long-lost blue belt was out for blood. “I thought he was just your typical bodybuilder who would take a trial class and realize he couldn’t bench press his way out of a choke,” said the black belt. “Instead, he looked at me with those red, watery eyes and immediately passed my guard and pinned me down in side control. I recognized him for just a moment before he took one of his fists, reached inside my soul, and — ” He pauses, a single tear leaking from his eye. “— crushed my ego.”
It is thus far unclear if these “boo belts” are human or a far more sinister creature from another world. The Jiu-Jitsu Times contacted a DNA specialist, Maya Baldwin, who took samples from the sweat left on the mats of the haunted gyms, and she reported inconclusive and unsettling results.
“The results were a partial match for the blue belts who had disappeared without a trace from the affected academies, the keyword being ‘partial,'” said Baldwin. “These, erm, beings appear to be 50 percent human, with the other 50 percent being a variable mix of steroids, takedowns, and unresolved childhood trauma.”
One black belt of five years went so far as to bring in a paranormal investigation group, who reported that the blue belts responded strongly to videos and photos of 2019 ADCC silver medalist Nick Rodriguez. Their evidence, however, was marred by outside interference. “We took some EVP [electronic voice phenomena] recordings in hopes of communicating with the blue belts — why they disappeared, why they’re so vengeful, the source of their newfound power, that sort of thing,” said Los Angeles Paranormal Co. investigator Marcos Vega. “We thought we caught some really clear audio of one saying, ‘Stop calling them ‘blue belts’ — they have some college wrestling experience, and that explains why they’re dominating us even though we’ve been grappling for longer than they’ve been alive,’ but it turns out it was just one of the coaches at the gym.”
When the Jiu-Jitsu Times asked said coach to clarify his remarks, he declined to offer further comment.
As reports of the hauntings spread across the United States, so do the rumors and speculation about how the phenomenon might continue to develop. “What’s next?” pondered New Jersey black belt Tyler Thomas. “Do I have to be scared of week-one white belts winning Polaris? Are my twelve years of BJJ going to be made invalid by a 70-year-old Aikido practitioner?” He shakes his head. “I thought the idea of blue belts coming back to the gym was just an old wives’ tale used to scare purple belts into not skipping the warmup. I never thought we’d see this ghost story come to life before our very eyes.”
UPDATE: The Jiu-Jitsu Times has just received a report of “zombie-like” teenage orange belts bowing to a YouTube highlight video of 16-year-old ADCC semi-finalist Tye Ruotolo; we will continue to provide updates on the situation as they become available.